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John 6:67-6 (TPT)

67 So Jesus said to his twelve, “And you—do you also want to leave?” 

68 Peter spoke up and said, “But Lord, where would we go? No one but you gives us the revelation of eternal life. 

69 We’re fully convinced that you are the Anointed One, the Son of the Living God,[a] and we believe in you!”


There have been many points on this journey where the Lord has revealed a "hard teaching" much like what was shared in John 6, learning what it is to "eat His flesh and drink His blood".  These hard lessons that come in the experiences of loss, hurt, the cost of loving hurting people, the cost of choosing to yield and submit, the cost of following Jesus. 

My pregnancies and deliveries were all unique, just as unique as my children and each delivery came with a challenge.  I had decided during my first pregnancy and delivery to do everything natural and with the exception of labor induction I had no medical interventions.  In my second pregnancy and delivery it was much the same going through intense allergy symptoms, but a releatively quick delivery and struggle with post-partum.  By the third pregnancy and delivery many factors had changed, our choice to be live-in house staff in a maternity housing program had greatly challenged and altered my eating habits, my time spent in exercise and preparation...I had other young moms and their children, volunteers and team members as well as my husband and daughters who all had part of my time, my schedule and my heart.  I was learning the sacrifice and hard lesson of loving others over myself and with it came a great emotional and physical struggle that spilled into the circumstances and my readiness for the delivery.  I felt unable to push through and asked for an epidural during the labor...for me it was a weak moment that caused more pain and discomfort and came with longer term discomforts and physical pain. 

My choice to share my life with others deeply affected and challenged me.  The birth was dramatic and the post-partum difficult but I had tasted and was convinced that God is good and this struggle was only temporary; looking back I knew that I would choose the hard path of doing life with others where Jesus led over the comfort of living life on my terms and in my control. In the middle of the delivery struggle I also knew that the delivery and birth of my baby was promised, there would be an end and the outcome was worth it. 

I have had this experience again and again getting through a hard season of challenge and struggle [emotionally, physically, spirtually] then I get to the top and see the view and know that I am not going back.  This new place I have been brought out to and what lies ahead is where I want to go following after the heart of Jesus.

May you be fully convinced that Jesus is the Son of the Living God!  May you see the view ahead and not loose heart! 

May you follow after the heart of Jesus!